This game is known to get overheated. Store in a cool, dry place. May cause inflated egos, hostile negotiations, an unhealthy respect for loopholes, temporary loss of moral compass, and but not limited to delusions of regulatory immunity. If symptoms persist, please consult your conscience.

Haggleoff is a satirical game. Any resemblance to real-world corruption is purely coincidental… and deeply unfortunate. Haggleoff does not endorse criminal behavior. It merely simulates it for your entertainment—and moral discomfort—based on the choices you make in the game. It does not promote bribery, corruption, or the commission of criminal acts in real life. All crimes committed in Haggleoff are purely fictional. Please do not attempt any in-game behavior in real life—at home, in the office, or offshore.

The Haggleoff currency is not recognized by any central bank, governing body, or ethical oversight committee. It is not FDIC insured, morally endorsed, or spiritually redeemable. The use of Haggleoffs may result in sudden wealth, crushing debt, or spontaneous litigation—none of which are redeemable or enforceable in the real world.